This document is a transcript of a seminar on the subject of, the highest laws in the Universe.
Seminar conducted on 11th August 2012 At Sao Paulo, Brazil
Welcome to our Brazilian people and also to our Swedish people. Today what I was thinking of doing was talking to you about something that’s very, very important from God’s perspective, and that is the principles of repentance and forgiveness, but let’s start at the beginning.
2. Karma and the Law of Compensation
All of you would have heard of the term “karma”, which is the pain of the penalties of your life that is lived out of harmony with love but in traditional spiritual circles karma is said to be related to reincarnation. In other words, when a person has been born again there is a belief that they were paying for the their previous life’s actions that were out of harmony with love and they feel that the next life is something that they would then have to pay for, for the actions of the previous life. But the spirits in the spirit world know that karma is something that happens every single moment: in other words, every single moment we choose to act out of harmony with love there is an automatic damage that occurs to our own soul. This happens the instant we act out of harmony with love and not at some later time or in our next life.
There is a name given to karma in the spirit world and the name given is called the Law of Compensation. This law states that whenever we act out of harmony with love there will be an automatic damage to our own soul and also damage to the soul of another person who we might have harmed. We carry this injury around until we’re prepared to change and correct it. This is what is called the Law of Compensation so whatever you have been taught about karma is really the Law of Compensation but it is not related to reincarnation. Rather, it is something that happens in your day-to-day life as you live your life.
This Law of Compensation is a very restricting law in that anything that we do out of harmony with love is automatically needed to be compensated for. It’s not our definition of love but it is God’s definition of love, and
1 Time codes restart at the beginning of each part of a session.
2 Also known as Alan John Miller, or AJ.
quite often what we believe to be loving is nowhere near as loving as what God believes is loving. This law has been made by God to help people come to see when they are been unloving, so that they can take actions to correct their unloving behaviour.
Now in our previous discussions in Belo Horizonte, in “The Truth About ‒ The Human Soul” and “The Truth About ‒ God”, we talked about the relationship between God and man and that from God’s perspective all development is about love. When we talk about spiritual development we are not referring to development in metaphysical actions or development in special gifts, but primarily talking about the quality of love.
Every one of God’s Laws is developing this quality of love and God’s entire universe is constructed by laws surrounding love. When we are involved in what is called karma ‒ or what most of the spirits call the Law of Compensation ‒ these are actions that the universe takes, based on the law, to help us to become more loving. This is a very slow way of becoming loving and the reason why is that every single action has to be measured and then corrected if it’s out of harmony with love. This is a very, very slow process.
Most people on Earth have very little idea how unloving they are. Often they are taking actions every single day that are unloving and the Law of Compensation or karma is placing the penalty upon the soul for the breaking of the law. But most people are unaware of this and it’s only when they pass over into the spirit world and they look at their face in a mirror and they look at their body they see all of the errors that they have done all of their life. For most people when they pass over, they find it very confronting and very difficult to come face to face with what has happened. Because very little is known about this on the Earth, most people on Earth continue to take unloving actions that they believe are loving and it’s only when they pass over into the spirit world and they see their dark condition that they realise that something must be wrong.
There is lots of spirit interaction going on here. Often spirits want to interrupt these kind of conversations because it is very confronting for them to hear the same material and this is something that happens regularly with the talks that I give. Getting back to the talk.
God is trying to help us become more loving and so God created some laws that help refine us to become more loving. The Law of Compensation is such that whenever we do something out of harmony with love, there is an automatic correction that occurs in our soul that is painful. This pain is telling us that we just took an action out of harmony with love. Most people on Earth are very desensitised to pain and as a result of that they are not sensitive to this painful consequence and so they continue their same actions that they took before without listening to the correction that was given.
Now to establish a relationship with God and the main point of me travelling the world talking to people is to help them establish a relationship with God, to help them become at-one with God. When we become at-one with God, we can no longer do anything that is unloving and therefore there is automatically no penalty because every action we take is based on love.
Now what I would like to do is illustrate the difference between this Law, the Law of Compensation and another law that will help you have a relationship with God; this Law is called the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness. But before we proceed with that particular law, what we would like to do is explain how laws have a hierarchy.
For instance, with the physical laws you’ve heard of the Law of Gravity. The Law of Gravity is about what happens to a person or any mass when there is no firm substance under us; this law determines how fast we will be attracted to the Earth, the ground. This Law of Gravity is a very fundamental law. If we did not have gravity, we would fly off the Earth at a speed of over sixteen hundred kilometres an hour and we would fly out into space ‒ because that’s how fast the Earth is spinning. And anything that is on the top of the Earth spinning at the same speed that is not connected firmly to the Earth through gravity will automatically fly into space. So we would arrive on the Earth just being born and within a few seconds we would die because there is nothing in between stopping us from flying out into space.
Now there is another law, which supersedes this law ‒ the Law of Gravity ‒ and that is the Law of Aerodynamics. The Law of Aerodynamics states that as long as I have a curved wing structure that is propelled fast enough through the air, lift will be created due to the pressure above the wing being lower than the pressure below the wing and this creates the lift. If I have one of these wings then I can overcome gravity. This Law of Aerodynamics is higher than the Law of Gravity.
The Law of Aerodynamics overcomes the Law of Gravity. Both laws are still in operation at the same time, but the conditions are different for the Law of Aerodynamics and because the conditions are different it acts like the previous law is not there for a moment. For as long as we put into practice the conditions of the Law of Aerodynamics, it looks like the Law of Gravity does not exist. But as soon as the conditions are not met anymore for the Law of Aerodynamics, then gravity instantly comes into action. So if we’re flying along in our aeroplane and one of the wings break, now the Law of Gravity comes into effect. Even though we have one wing, there is no balance and now the Law of Gravity will take over and pull us straight to the ground.
Now this is very much the same with all of God’s Laws. All of God’s Laws have a hierarchy like this and the highest laws operate upon the soul. The soul is not our spirit body and it is not our physical body; it is our real self and it is the highest of God’s creations.
These two laws, the Law of Aerodynamics and the Law of Gravity, operate upon my physical body but they do not operate upon my soul. They also do not operate upon my spirit body either. This is why a person can have an experience of leaving their physical body and experience what many call astral travel and then return back to the physical body; because the soul and the spirit body are not forced to stay on the Earth through the Law of Gravity. Our soul and our spirit body can leave our physical body and return to our physical body. In fact each of us does this every night when we go to sleep.
But there are other laws that operate only upon the soul and these laws are the highest possible laws that God has made. Every action of these laws is to do with love and the Law of Compensation is a law that operates upon the soul but it is one of the lowest laws operating upon the soul. Just like the Law of Gravity is a low law operating on the physical body, the Law of Compensation is a low law operating upon the soul. And there are higher laws that can also operate upon the soul that can cause the soul to fly as it were, similar to how wings can cause the physical body to fly. These laws are all called the Laws of Divine Love, and these laws surround one primary law, and that is the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness.
3.3. The Law of Repentance and Forgiveness
Now very few spirits in the spirit world know of the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness and for that reason very few people on earth have been told it. Now almost every spirit knows of the Law of Compensation and so when they speak to the Earth through a medium they speak of this law in operation. But very few spirits know of the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness, and for that reason very few people on Earth ever hear of this law.
When many people who pass over from the Earth to the spirit world look at their condition in the mirror and they see their dark condition, after a while they realise that their dark condition is because of the lack of love in their soul. Then, because it is not well known about the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness, they realise they have to engage the Law of Compensation in order to remove the result of these unloving actions in their soul. But they don’t realise that we could actually remove them using a higher law, and it’s this law, the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness that I would like to discuss with you in detail.
Are there any questions about it so far? Does everyone understand the hierarchy of laws? Just like gravity is lower than aerodynamics, so too this Law of Compensation is lower than the Law of Repentance.
4. Laws that affect the soul in turn affect the spirit and physical bodies
Does the Law of Compensation operate directly on the soul and affect the spiritual body and the physical body at different speeds?
Yes, because the soul is connected to the spirit body. Whatever is happening in the soul will have an effect in the spirit body. So when a person can see their chakras there will be certain effects on the chakras that come from the soul and in fact all of the energy points of your spirit body are all dependent upon what’s happening in the soul. In addition, the physical body is also influenced only by the soul so these blocked-up feelings and lack of love inside of the soul affect the suffering of the physical body as well.
Now the older cells in our physical body are around seven years old and every seven years our physical body cells replicate. There are some cells that replicate much faster than this but the seven year period is normal so if a change happens in the soul where the soul becomes more unloving, then you’ll start to see the effect in the physical body seven years later. But you will see the effect in the spirit body much sooner because almost all cells in the spirit body replicate within one month of our time as measured here on Earth. So you’ll see the effect much more rapidly in the spirit body when the soul acts out of harmony with love.
So the soul has a direct effect on the physical body without passing through the spiritual body?
If I can draw the reality a bit differently: if you can imagine that this red is the physical body and this blue is the spirit body, then that’s how the two bodies look. And then if you can imagine that this yellow is the soul you can see that the soul envelopes both bodies.
Now because the soul envelops both bodies anything that happens to the soul automatically affects both bodies. Because the spirit body responds faster, the spirit body’s energy systems are the first things to be affected and this is why the chakras instantly change. But the physical body, because of its genetic replication process, takes much longer to be affected and it could take up to seven years for some changes in the soul to be shown in the physical body. The reality is that for most of us, at the time we die is when our body best mirrors our true soul condition.
For the majority of people when they die of old age, the body looks quite haggard; many times they are overweight in different areas of their body, the face is very lined, they have skin blemishes and these are all a part of their spirit body’s energy systems not working properly. That occurs because the soul is already out of harmony with love and it has caused these problems to both bodies.
Could you say that those effects are the result of a gradual destruction of the bodies?
Yes, this gradual destruction of the spirit body and the gradual destruction of the physical body result from every time the soul acts out of harmony with love. These bodies are one of the ways we can measure the reflection of how we have been unloving. Of course there are some other ways, but we are often quite self- absorbed and so looking at our body is a good way to measure things.
As we grow in love our bodies have the capacity to grow younger rather than growing older and in fact scientists today do not even understand why the body grows old and dies. But the reason why is because the unloving decisions made in the soul cause the spirit body and then the physical body to degrade in its condition.
Now when we pass over into the spirit world we do not have the physical body anymore, but we still have the spirit body and that is still reflecting the soul’s condition. It is the soul’s condition in love that determines what happens to the spirit body and to the physical body, and it’s this Law of Compensation that causes the gradual destruction of both bodies because the soul is choosing to act out of harmony with love.
If you’re stuck in the Law of Compensation you’re going to take much longer to undo the lack of love. So if you go beyond the Law of Compensation and you go to the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness you take a leap forward?
Yes, you take a leap in helping your soul to become more loving very rapidly. This is why this Law of Repentance and Forgiveness is very important to understand; unfortunately it is one of the laws on Earth that is very rarely understood.
4.1. God’s Laws are constant
Until two million years ago we were under the old laws. But around two thousand years ago the laws changed; before that the laws that didn’t speak about love were stronger and then the law that related to love started operating.
Let me explain what happened two thousand years ago: all of God’s Laws existed and in fact all of God’s Laws still exist now as they did millions of years ago. God’s Laws themselves do not change but our discovery of them changes. Two thousand years ago when I first came to Earth, I helped discover these laws regarding Divine Love. The laws existed before then but nobody had discovered them or knew how to use them. Once somebody discovered them and learnt how to use them, now that could benefit everybody.
Just like a hundred years ago somebody discovered aerodynamics and now everybody flies; it’s very similar with regard to these laws. Before two thousand years ago the Law of Compensation was the only law that was discovered and although the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness was present, nobody knew how to use it. All of the Laws of Divine Love were discovered at that time, but that doesn’t mean that there aren’t more laws to discover because God has created an infinite system and mankind is always discovering new things about what God has made.
3 Mary Magdalene. Also known as Mary Suzanne Luck.
So it’s not an issue of discovering but applying?
Well you need to discover before you can apply. If you don’t know what is available you often go along blindly without being aware. So you need to apply it but before you can apply it you need to discover it.
4.2. Auras are created by the spirit body
So the light or colour you see around people, is that the spiritual body or the soul?
That is from the spirit body. But the spirit body’s condition is reflected by the soul and so the soul causes the spirit body’s condition. The reality is that when a person is developed in love ‒ most people on Earth cannot see their aura because the colours associated with a highly developed aura cannot be seen by the physical body’s eyes and cannot be seen by most people’s spirit body’s eyes either. So for example, a spirit who is white can appear white even if they are in the second dimension, but at the moment there are thirty six levels of dimensions and if white is in the second dimension, then you must wonder what is above.
Many people on Earth see images of spirits, but this does not mean that the spirit is portraying themselves accurately to the person on Earth. Spirits are capable of changing their condition and projecting an image into your mind of their condition that they themselves do not have; they are able to project a facade. And we must be very careful because if we cannot feel the spirit and feel its condition, then we will believe what we see rather than feeling something more deeply.
But you are correct in the sense that the spirit body is the aura that you see and the colours coming out of the spirit body are the emotions that are present in the soul. Sometimes a person who is a very dark soul can have a bright colour coming out of them because in that moment they have an emotion of sincerity or of love and this emotion comes out as a different colour to their dark soul. But the spirit body will accurately reflect through its appearance the true long-term condition of the soul. We are all capable of occasional moments of brilliance, but once we are fully developed in love every moment will be a moment of brilliance. It’s important to remember that the soul envelops both bodies and therefore controls their condition.
4.3. Vibrational remedies affect the spirit body and physical body, but not the soul
Would you say that core vibrational remedies like homeopathy operate on the spiritual body?
So-called vibration remedies, where people are trying to improve their vibrations, can affect both the spirit body and the physical body, but they will not change the soul. Because the soul does not change and the soul causes all of the problems in both of these bodies, any vibrational change or chakra change will generally have a temporary effect on the spirit body and the physical body – with one exception. Sometimes people have spirits attached to their spirit body and these spirits attach in different locations, depending on where there is an emotional injury and if you break that attachment then that part of the body will no longer be severely affected by that spirit and this will be an instant change. But aside from that, the soul is the thing that determines the condition.
So when you’re changing the soul, is it useful to use a therapy on the physical body to facilitate the change?
The problem with any therapy that affects the physical body or the spirit body is that in a way it makes us believe something has changed when the soul is yet to change. And we can start to begin to think that we have actually changed when the soul is still in the same damaged state.
The way I see my physical body and the specific injuries that it has and the pains that it experiences is that it is a perfect measuring stick to tell me what’s wrong with my soul and so if I spend my money or time trying to fix my physical body ailments without doing any work on my soul, then I am wasting both time and money, and I’m also fooling myself in the process. It would be far more effective if I focussed on my soul and allowed the physical and spirit bodies to reflect my condition because that’ll tell me everything.
I understand though that most people feel a bit resistive to that. Most people want the pain of their physical body to reduce without having to do anything else and so they might take a pill. For example I have a headache so I take a headache tablet instead of seeing that my headache was created by my soul suppressing its desire to cry. So instead of seeing the true cause of my headache, I take a headache tablet, the headache disappears and now my desire to cry has also disappeared because it’s been suppressed. I had a chance to release something from my soul and I chose to try to fix my physical body instead but the problem still exists in my soul.
4.4. Healing the soul repairs the physical and spirit bodies
When you change the soul is the change in the physical body instantaneous or does it take a period of time?
In almost all cases the result is instantaneous because the soul is no longer imposing a corrupted energy system upon the spirit body and so therefore the energy system no longer affects the physical body and no longer causes damage to the physical body. However there are some issues that our physical body faces that have a seven year cycle and so it may take some time before the effects show in the physical body.
Any time we engage the Law of Compensation any change that is made to the soul will have a gradual effect upon the bodies in a positive direction and any unloving behaviours that we engage with our soul will have a gradual effect on our bodies in a painful negative direction. In a minute, when we talk about the Law of
Repentance and Forgiveness, you will find that it engages much faster processes where things can happen to the physical body and the spirit body instantly based upon what occurs in the soul.
5. Engaging the Law of Compensation vs. the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness
So say you’re stuck in the lower law, in a spiral going back and forth, rotating in the same dimension under the Law of Compensation, and if you then shift to the higher law you move to an upper vibration, where you’re in another space?
No, remember I said earlier that all of the laws are operational on everyone and it’s just that many of us are not aware of it? The Law of Compensation operates upon every soul who has not engaged the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness. Sometimes within the one person there are some things that they are repentant for and at the same time there are other things they are not repentant for. So, with the things that they are repentant for, the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness is in operation but with the things they are not repentant for the Law of Compensation is in operation. It’s not that the person has embraced the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness all the time.
It’s very important to understand that, because many times we think we’re engaged in the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness when we are not, and we’re actually engaging the Law of Compensation. But understand that the Law of Compensation does help us progress; it’s not a law that creates stagnation. In fact none of God’s Laws create stagnation. All of God’s Laws are about making us progress but this progression is much slower because we are resistive to change.
You see, when we are resistive to change we are not repentant and now the Law of Compensation grinds away at us, trying to get us to change and we are often at the same time trying to stop change and the reason why the Law of Compensation operates upon most people most of the time is because most people are resistant to embracing more truth about love. We have excuses, we have justifications, we minimise, we shift the blame onto other people; these are all the things we do that are out of harmony with love and while we’re doing that the Law of Compensation is grinding away trying to get us to realise that something is wrong.
The Law of Compensation is a very important law for people who do not want to change but for people who want to change, the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness is a much more important law because this is a way you can embrace change very rapidly. Both laws are essential in God’s universe to cause a correction of people and to bring the entire universe into more love. They’re both very important. The Law of Compensation acts because we are resistive and the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness acts because we are willing, and when you are willing you can do things much faster than if you are resistive.
Perhaps now we need to discuss the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness in a lot more detail and then we’ll understand what’s involved.
5.1. The Law of Compensation can cause sickness in our bodies
When we use the Law of Compensation is that where we need to get sick to learn?
A very good question! The reality is that most of us get sick because we are already rejecting truth and in fact all sickness is the result of the rejection of truth, or if you could say it more specifically, the result of acting in an unloving way without noticing it. As a result of that, for many years we have engaged in the unloving behaviour and the physical body sickness is showing us that something is wrong; the Law of Compensation is causing our physical body to be sick. But when you think about it, it’s not really the law that causes it; it’s our unwillingness to see what’s in the soul that causes it. But all physical sickness that we ever experience and all accidents that we have are a result of something that’s going on in the soul, something that we need to correct and the Law of Compensation is showing us.
Now the Law of Compensation is rapid in its action and in some cases can cause very rapid effects such as an accident. Other times we are suppressing over a long period of time and we’re slowly becoming more resistive and this is usually the cause of our physical sicknesses and diseases.
5.2. The Law of Compensation demonstrates our unloving choices to ourselves and others
Can it be that we’re unloving to others or to ourselves?
Yes, remember that love is not just about loving others but it’s also about loving yourself. You cannot sacrifice the love of others for yourself and you cannot sacrifice the love of yourself for others. There needs to be a perfect balance in the soul of love of others and self and in fact true love of yourself and true love of others will never cause a compromise between those two positions. But many of us have been taught to not love ourselves or we have been taught to be selfish where we do not love others, and the Law of Compensation will show us in both cases how there is a problem in our soul.
The Law of Compensation is the effect of the soul’s unloving choices. The soul itself will attract, through the Law of Attraction, new events that will cause the soul to be triggered emotionally but these new events, if we act unlovingly with them, will cause a further degradation of our soul.
For example, let’s say that I’m a woman and I feel unloved by men. I will then attract a man who is unloving towards me and this is because my soul doesn’t have a good opinion of itself and so it will automatically attract a man who reflects that opinion. Now in that interaction I have a choice: I can choose to ask the man to leave and thereby grow in my condition of love towards myself or I can choose to embrace the unloving actions of the man and, because of my fear or other emotion, do whatever he wants and this will reduce my condition because I am being unloving to myself.
In this regard we see how love of self is just as important to God as love of others: in fact to God it is of equal importance that you love yourself as well as love others and true love of self does not sacrifice for others and true love of others does not sacrifice yourself. This is something that the whole world needs to learn about love.
Everything is about what’s happening with love in the soul. The Law of Compensation is a loving law attempting to correct the unwilling soul, whereas the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness is a law that involves the willing soul. It’s a way for the willing soul to be corrected and become more in harmony with love. So let’s explain the law in more detail shall we?
Could we just get a bigger picture of it in a way to use the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness?
Yes, the reason why I use the analogy of the Law of Gravity and the Law of Aerodynamics is that it illustrates the higher law superseding a lower law and the beauty of the Law of Aerodynamics is that it can create so many things. When we’re bound to the Earth and the Law of Gravity is underway, there is a limitation to how fast we can travel, there’s a limitation of where we can go. As soon as we engage the Law of Aerodynamics there are now fewer limitations. It’s exactly the same with the relationship between the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness and the Law of Compensation. However I wouldn’t say that we build the aeroplane ‒ God’s already built it; it’s just us finding it.
Actually, from a physical perspective, above the Law of Aerodynamics there are higher laws of movement and one is, for example, the Law of Teleportation, which man has not yet discovered is one such law. The Law of Repentance and Forgiveness is one of the highest laws that affect the soul and one of the reasons why is that it engages your desire, and the laws that engage desire are more powerful than the laws that engage resistance.
The Law of Compensation engages resistance and this is the law that most people on the planet are always engaging without knowing, we are automatically engaging without realising it most of the time but the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness cannot be engaged mistakenly.
So you only engage it when you know it?
Not only that, it can only be engaged through desire and that’s why it’s a more powerful law.
We are all engaging the Law of Compensation by accident but we have to engage the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness with a definite affirmative action. However we’re often very resistant to engaging the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness because it requires a deep state of humility and so we get forced into engaging the Law of Compensation, because engaging this law requires very little or no humility.
6. Engaging the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness
Let’s discuss the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness, and then we’ll compare it a bit more to the Law of Compensation. Then what we were hoping to do tomorrow is to talk to some spirits who want to learn about these laws and in having these discussion with some spirits we will be able to help them see which laws they have been engaging and how to engage the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness in doing so we will all learn how to do it for ourselves. Now let’s look more closely at the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness, as the name suggests, has two sides. There is the side that’s engaged by God and then there’s the side that’s engaged by our soul or, to make it more personal, it would be better to say my soul.
Now it’s very important for me to understand that there are two sides to this law. One side is really easy because it involves God and God’s emotions, which are always loving and perfect. The other side is very hard because it engages our soul and we are very imperfect and often becoming more imperfect by the minute and as a result the part that we need to play is the most difficult to make happen.
If you think about it, just imagine for a moment there’s another person here, another person’s souls. If we wished to be sorry for our actions, then we would want to feel about things that we’ve done to others and what would you do if you were truly sorry?
6.1. The two stages of repentance
Let’s say you had a best friend that you had hurt deeply through one of your actions, what would you do and feel? Well initially you may feel guilt, that’s telling you you’ve done something wrong, but is guilt an emotion that causes you to fix the relationship? In a lot of ways guilt is a selfish emotion because it doesn’t cause you to act and it makes you believe that you feel worse than the person you hurt.
Initially we would want to acknowledge that we’d done something. But would acknowledge cure the problem? The person still feels hurt and we might say to them, “I know that I’ve hurt you,” and they would probably say in return, “So, what are you going to do about it?” (Laughter) So while acknowledgement is important, there must be a lot more depth to our acknowledgement before the other person will feel that we’re sorry. Repentance was mentioned, but let’s define repentance. So what does it really mean to be sorry?
When we want to feel what it feels like for the other person.
Yes, so you would want to know the feeling of how they feel. You would want to know and be able to feel how the other person feels. How can you know how hurt this person is if you can’t feel how they would feel? So you need to be able to feel how they feel to truly acknowledge what you’ve done.
I think I would like to repair and undo what I have done.
Yes, this is very important. There are two actions in repentance. The first part is the deep grieving, the intense emotional experience of sadness. It is the experience of an overwhelming emotion that is larger than what you believe you can even handle. That’s one part of repentance.
The second part of repentance is a desire to repair the wrong; to fix it. Now to fix it, can you see that you’d have to find out why you broke it? In other words you would have to find out why your soul took the action to cause this hurt.
If you only had this deep grief but you had no desire to repair the reason why you caused the sorrow, then you are not yet repentant, you are not yet truly sorry. Let’s say I cut up the other person’s dress (laughter) in my anger and rage and then I felt this terrible feeling of true deep sorrow. If I was really sorry what would I do? Wouldn’t I buy her another dress? If I was truly sorry I would.
Now the other person would then feel that I am really sorry and in fact in my relationship with this person it would help them forgive me if they saw that I was that sorry.
Something I myself find with repentance, or with what I call repentance, is that I want to fix it but I don’t want to feel deep grief.
I find that I want to fix it without feeling the deep grief and sorrow, especially sorrow for what the other person must feel. So this is a guilt place for us.
Yes, if we desire only to fix something and we have not gone through the deep sorrow, then how can we know what to fix? Because we are yet to understand the damage we have done. It’s only by feeling the deep grief and sorrow that we understand the true extent of the damage and therefore what we can really do to fix it. And remember fixing it is not fixing it for the other person; it’s removing from our soul the cause as to why we took the action.
In the case of me cutting up my friend’s dress in a fit of rage, I would need to find out why I was so angry and I would probably find that I’m so angry because I am jealous or I have some other such emotion. If I really want to fix this problem permanently, I would have to remove this jealous emotion from me before I could stop doing this to my friend because while this emotion exists in me, there might be times in the future when I get angry and I decide to cut up another dress (laughter) or do something else that harms her.
When I find the real cause within myself and I release from myself the reason why I have done this thing, there is now no longer any risk of me doing it ever again; the problem will be permanently fixed. When we have a desire to fix it permanently, we do not focus on trying to make the other person feel good again but rather we
focus on trying to remove from our own soul the entire reason why we took the action in the first place. Once we do that, this person will feel the change and they will know that the problem has been permanently fixed and when you think about it that’s the only time they can really trust you.
If you do some damage to the other person without going through these two steps, the person will feel that something is not right and while they might forgive you, they may not ever trust you again because the reality is that while the cause remains in your soul, you are untrustworthy and you will probably do the same thing again.
I feel at times when I try to fix the problem and I even know the cause inside me but I haven’t healed it, then I use control to not do a harmful thing. But the Law of Compensation actually acts on the cause doesn’t it?
So even if I don’t take the action again, the cause is still in me, and I’m damaging my own soul.
And you’re remaining in the same condition on that particular thing, yes.
So can you see with the interaction with this other person, there are two steps that we need to take primarily but they have to be steps that are taken with a pure heart. It’s not something that we can manufacture, we can’t make out. What we need to do is understand that these two things have to come from our own desire to do them, and the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness is all about your own desire. It’s about your own desire to know the damage you’ve done not only to others, but also to yourself.
6.2. Repentance needs to be engaged in order to be able to feel God’s Forgiveness
So this can be engaged with God. As far as it depends upon us, repentance comes from us and it is a two-step process involving these two things. When we feel feelings of repentance and in particular we direct them to God, then God responds by helping us feel the feeling, which is a feeling of forgiveness. Now God has already forgiven every one of our actions, but we will not feel that God has forgiven us unless our soul enters a state of repentance. This is a very interesting thing. If I could liken it to other emotions:
I will not feel loved even if somebody else loves me unless I am open to receiving the feeling of love. In the same regard, I will not feel forgiven unless my soul is open to the feeling of being forgiven. The action inside of me that causes me to be open to the feeling of forgiveness is repentance. In other words I must become truly repentant before I will feel the emotion of forgiveness from God and this is a very important thing to understand. You see God has already forgiven.
God forgives each of us the instant we take unloving actions, but we will not feel the calming effect of forgiveness unless we ourselves see what we have done; until we acknowledge what we have done and we feel a deep grief and overwhelming sorrow because of what we have done, and we have a desire to find the emotion inside of our soul that caused us to do what we have done. Once we do these things, our soul becomes open, and once our soul is open, we will feel the feeling of forgiveness.
6.3. Logic and our emotions need to be engaged to feel the pain we’ve caused to others
So repentance is not a rational mental thing? You have to know a lot about yourself to know why you have taken such action.
Exactly; it involves two things. It involves using your logic and it involves using your heart.
Logic alone will not lead you to repentance and if you just follow your heart, there are often injured emotions in your heart and so you would not recognise the unloving emotion. You need a combination of both to understand what you have done. It’s no good saying to a person, “That must have hurt you,” when you can’t feel how it would have hurt them. There has to be a feeling associated with the logic. This is very important to understand about the feeling of repentance.
We need to engage both our heart and our head. As we do that we will often find the emotion inside of our soul that caused the action and we can use our mind to help our heart feel it. Many of us use our mind to help our heart deny it. In other words we use our mind to shut down our feelings, but it is much better for our soul if we use our mind to open up our feelings. Some of the ways we use our mind to shut down our feelings are that we judge our feelings or we worry in our mind that other people will laugh at us for having those feelings. This is a way that we shut down our feelings. We become more concerned about what everybody else thinks than actually having the feeling and this is not very good for repentance.
For example if you’re a mother and you start to notice the damaging things you’ve done to your children and you become truly repentant, you’ll find many other mothers around you will try to convince you that those things were not damaging and the reason why is that they don’t want to feel the same feelings. They’ll try to convince you that the thing you’ve now recognised as truth is not true and they’ll try to convince you that there’s no need for repentance.
This is how many of us stay out of repentance. We allow other people in our environment to shut down the process of repentance that begins within us because we’re worried about what everybody else thinks about it. Sometimes too we’re also worried about being humiliated or controlled and we’re worried that if we are truly expressive of what we’ve done that other people will condemn us in some way and they often do. This is the reason why most people revert back to the Law of Compensation ‒ because they do not want to engage these other emotions and then they become resistive to repentance. Now the Law of Compensation is going to do its work because our soul is unwilling. Remember the Law of Compensation is for the unwilling soul whereas the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness is for the willing soul.
What if we’re not aware of how much suffering we’ve caused someone else?
If you’re not aware of how much suffering you’ve caused others, then you have not begun repentance because the reality is every person who is repentant is fully aware of everything they have done to others. The beauty of this process of becoming aware is that it makes our soul more sensitive to unloving actions and this is a very powerful thing that can happen to our soul. If you’re in a state where you are unaware, then you are automatically being guided by the Law of Compensation until such time as you have a desire to be aware. Remember as soon as you begin to have a desire, you are now changing over from an unwilling soul to a willing soul and as a result you are now starting to engage the Law of Repentance.
The reality for most of us is that we are unaware of many of the damaging things we have done but if you long to God to know from God what are the things that you have done, then God will present them to you as fast as you are able to handle. God will help you to become more aware. It is only our resistance that causes us to have a lack of desire and the only reason we resist is generally because we’re afraid, and then we don’t want to know the truth.
So desire and humility precede repentance?
Yes, in fact desire precedes most things. You don’t even get out of bed in the morning without a desire. You don’t eat without a desire and you don’t drink without a desire. So desire is a very important emotion that we need to embrace.
Humility is a more difficult emotion to embrace because it requires that we become truly knowledgeable of how we currently are. It requires that we see ourselves accurately, not from our own perspective but from God’s and this is very, very difficult. So humility is a very important quality to develop as well, if we’re ever going to be repentant. In fact a person who is not humble will never be able to admit they have done something wrong and
therefore never be able to engage the Law of Repentance. And so the Law of Compensation will grind away upon their unwilling soul until such a time as they choose to become repentant.
One of the most powerful things we can do with our life is to desire to know everything that we have done that is out of harmony with love and then the second most powerful thing we can do with our life is to become repentant for everything that we have done out of harmony with love.
The Truth About Repentance & Forgiveness
Single Session Part 2
What we’ve covered up to this point is that there are basically two laws which affect the recovery of the soul and bring the soul into harmony with love. The first law, the Law of Compensation, is automatically embraced by every person and it always corrects the unwilling soul. The second law, the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness, embraces the willing soul and it is a much more powerful law to help you change and become more loving.
Then remember that we discussed what happens when we do some things that are bad to others and how we need to have a feeling of deep sorrow and regret and this opens us up to wanting to permanently fix the problem with the other person, but to do that we must correct something that was in the soul that caused the unloving action towards the other person. This is a very difficult thing to do, because it involves using our mind and our heart to find the underlying causes of our unloving behaviour.
Now as soon as we engage desire and we project that desire to God, that is the same as prayer, and we can pray to become open to all of the unloving things that we have ever done. Once we do that our heart opens up and we
are able to feel some of the causes of our unloving behaviour. While God always forgives us, we will never be able to feel that forgiveness unless we have gone into a repentant state, because it’s the repentance that opens our heart and allows the feeling of forgiveness to enter it. Unless we are repentant, we will never feel the feeling of forgiveness.
Many people want to be forgiven without being repentant and this is impossible. While we are forgiven, we will not feel the feeling of forgiveness unless our heart is repentant. This is a very beautiful thing that God has done, because it is only the sincere heart that can feel forgiveness and the person who is insincere will never feel the forgiveness that God has for them.
Can we forgive someone who has harmed us if they are not repentant?
Well just as God has forgiven you even though you are not repentant, so too you can forgive another even if they are not repentant, but this requires releasing from you the emotions that you have towards them that cause you to feel hurt or angry. It’s not an exercise of your intellect but rather it’s an exercise of releasing the feeling that you have towards the other person that causes you to not like them.
Just as God has forgiven you before you became repentant, once you become at-one with God you will be able to forgive others before they are repentant. A very important part of the path towards God is even to learn how to forgive others without them feeling sorry for what they have done and this is the sign of a very developed individual. Now some people try to intellectually think they’ve forgiven while the emotion towards the other person is still present in their soul. To truly forgive you must release the emotion that is present in your soul towards the other person that causes you to feel attacking or angry with the other person.
If you practice these two things: repentance towards others and God and forgiveness of others and yourself, then you will make very rapid progress towards love. Of course like anything you need to know what you’re forgiving. There is no blanket forgiveness of, “I forgive you all”, without knowing the emotion that you have towards all. You must be aware of the emotion and have that emotional release before you truly forgive, just as you must be aware of the things you have done wrong towards another person or towards God. Without being aware you don’t know what you need to be repentant for, so you must be aware in your soul of what others have done towards you and what you have done towards others before you can truly repent or forgive.
Forgiveness can be done towards others: by your removing the reason in your soul that causes you to feel bad towards the other. I see many people try to avoid other people and they say they’ve forgiven them, but a person who has forgiven another does not avoid them. However if the other continues to attack you, a person who has forgiven may withdraw and stay away from the person who is attacking and they may continue doing this until the poor behaviour towards them ceases. In other words God does not expect you to continue to put up with bad behaviour from others without removing yourself from the situation but even if you remove yourself from the situation, it wouldn’t be because you don’t like the person, it would be because you loved yourself enough to not put up with this behaviour.
7. Forgiveness is feeling the pain that others have caused us, while repentance is feeling the pain that we have caused others
I feel like I was trained in my family to experience guilt and punish myself and then try to fix it, but that helps me avoid the cause in my soul. I hear what you say, that we must develop the desire to visit the cause inside of us, but how much does this family training impact on why I find it so difficult?
Obviously the family training has a very large effect on what you are capable of doing and it is often these family belief systems that cause us to reject deep grief and sorrow so the family belief systems have to be confronted as a part of the process.
If we look at what’s going on inside of ourselves, there is our real self that God has created; this self is without any damage. Then there is the injured self which our parents have created and then there is our facade self which we have created. There are two sets of damage to our soul: there’s the damage done by the family and the environment and then there is the damage done by our own unloving choices.
When I was a child, whenever my family or my environment acted unlovingly towards me and they did not give me an opportunity to release the emotion caused by their unloving behaviour, then an injury was created. I could still choose myself even with this injury, to act in a loving way, though of course that would be harder.
There are two types of damage then that we need to work our way through. The process of working our way through the damage of the injured self that comes from our family environment is a process of forgiveness. The process of working through the facade self, which is my choice to choose unloving behaviour, is repentance.
Forgiveness is needed in my relationship with others and my relationship with myself in order to release childhood damage. Repentance is needed for what I have chosen to do that is unloving towards others. A person who has progressed spiritually, or in other words has progressed in love has learned both how to repent and how to forgive ‒ they need both.
Now if I choose to repent of my own actions but at the same time I am blocked to forgiving others for theirs, then I will only progress so far in love and then stop. If I both repent and forgive, where I repent for the unloving behaviour I have taken and the unloving thoughts I have and the unloving words I have spoken, then I will do a great deal of benefit to my own soul and I will help other people who I have harmed. But there is a series of damage within myself that I was not responsible for and that my family and my environment is responsible for from when I was young, and I need to come face to face with that damage and then allow myself to forgive others. Both processes are emotional; they involve your emotions. Experiences must be felt rather than thought about, because it’s only the feeling of them that releases them.
If I’m to find the causes within myself that have caused me to be unloving, I have to visit the injury in myself and experience it and once I experience it, I can forgive.
Yes; the two emotions are very closely entwined and these two feelings of repentance and forgiveness on any single issue will probably be occurring together. You won’t be able to separate one from the other because the
reason we did things that were unloving is often related to what happened to us when we were a child. As a result of that our need for repentance has come from childhood injuries that we have acted upon unlovingly.
7.1. Most soul damage is due to the damage we have caused others
However, it’s important to see that the injuries that we have taken to act upon have been our choices that are based on unloving behaviour and anything that is our choices have a higher degree of responsibility than other people’s choices. So the majority of the damage that has been done to our soul is the result of the choices we have made, not the choices that other people have made. As I said earlier it is actually possible to act lovingly even when there are many injuries in the soul and we need to be aware of the fact that the personal choices we make have created the greatest amount of damage to our soul.
Now it is true that these personal choices are related to childhood injuries, but there is one primary thing we’ve forgotten if we believe that the injured self emotions are more important than the facade self emotions and that is the degree of responsibility. If I have made choices, then I am primarily responsible for those choices. I cannot help the choices of others, but I have direct control over my own personal choices, and for this reason it is my choices that have created the most damage to my soul. If we had only the childhood injuries/emotions but did not decide to make unloving choices as a result of them, we would have far less damage in our soul.
Now the only reason we don’t want to go into repentance is because we are unwilling to feel.
When we are unwilling to feel the injury, we do things to create choices to prevent us from feeling the injury, and these choices always damage another person. If we can see that it is only one problem that we have that causes us to not go into repentance and that is our unwillingness to feel. Really it is an unwillingness to be humble, because humility is the desire to feel everything without blaming any other person.
Because the childhood injuries happen to us and other people did them, we often feel very angry with those people and this causes us then to be unwilling to feel, but it is our unwillingness to feel that causes us to make choices that are unloving to ourselves and that is what causes most of the damage to our soul.
7.2. Emotional blockages to repentance and forgiveness
I feel like I’m trying to repent and I feel comfortable saying it’s my fault …
Well firstly can we translate that?
It’s okay; I can have this discussion another time but …
No, no but you are a bit resistive though. You’re already having some resistance to the discussion.
My feeling is that I’m trying to repent without a willingness to feel what I’ve done wrong, without feeling what my family has done wrong to me.
No, I can’t agree. The reason I cannot agree is that you are trying to blame yourself for things that are not your responsibility, but instead are the responsibility of your family. That is not repentance; that is taking responsibility for something that is not yours. When you are repentant you take responsibility for what you have done, not for what others have done. This is very different to what you’re attempting to do.
I have the same problem. Why does a person choose to do that?
Because we do not want to feel the pain of what our family has done, or even more important, we are afraid of the family reaction if we feel the pain, because the family will react when they feel blamed. What we do in that state is we place the responsibility for the injury on our family and this is a very appropriate thing to do because that is where it belongs. But in that moment the family will feel unfairly treated and often the family and environment react angrily and your fear of that causes you to accept responsibility for things that you are not responsible for.
I want to take responsibility for more than just my choices and that means I can’t repent or forgive and I get stuck.
Yes, you are not responsible for the unloving choices of others, you are only responsible for your own unloving choices. When you try to take responsibility for the unloving choices of others and then try to be repentant, it is impossible because you’re trying to be repentant for something somebody else did. That is a physical impossibility and under those circumstances the emotions will not flow.
7.3. We are responsible for all of our unloving actions
The first injuries that happened to us are rooted in us and who we are today. When do we know when our unloving acts or actions are our responsibility, or a consequence of what happened when we were children?
Our unloving actions are always our personal responsibility. There are many people who have been harmed terribly when they were little who are still able to act lovingly. There are also many people who have never been treated badly when they were little who have decided to act unlovingly and this is an indication of the will ‒ how the will is used.
The key thing to remember is that we are responsible for all of our own choices. However, God attributes different responsibility to every act we take because God can trace back to every single cause in the soul of those individuals who are affected because they have caused our own unloving belief systems. There is a deep responsibility in a person who teaches you, whether that person is a mother or father or parent or teacher, because they could teach you to do things that are out of harmony with love and therefore they bear partial responsibility for some of your unloving actions. We are always fully responsible for our own choices, but there are other people in our life who also bear some responsibility for those choices and God’s Laws automatically apportion the responsibility.
All we need to worry about is our own unloving choices; we don’t need to worry about who God has attributed some of the other choices to, because they need to worry about that. Any person who taught you something that was out of harmony with love will bear the responsibility for their particular actions however, there is also the personal responsibility we have for our own unloving actions. It is a very fair system.
7.4. Different influences on children create their injuries
So the original injury to the true self happened at the time of my conception. The responsibility for this is in my parents and the environment. Now between forgiveness and repentance, is there an age for the beginning of that responsibility?
There is no pre-set age. Each child exercises it differently. Some children decide at a very young age to start to do things with their own will. But as a generalisation by the time a child is seven years of age they have a relatively well developed intellect. As they then grow from seven years of age, if they are allowed, they exercise their will to a greater degree. Up until that time they are often just reflecting the unhealed emotions within their environment, but after that time they gradually become more self aware and as a result of becoming more self aware they also bear more responsibility for their own unloving actions.
So it is a gradual process, not a process that happens at a certain point in time. In addition unfortunately the situation is more complex, because if we examine the things that control the child there is often a very large system around them. So around the child there are often parents, grandparents from both the mother and father’s side and there are often spirits who also have an impact upon the child through these systems, and so the poor child is being influenced by very many people as it is growing.
Now that being the case, each of these people who are influencing the child bears a responsibility for the child’s injuries and therefore bears a subsequent responsibility for the child’s choice to be unloving. But all of God’s Laws act perfectly and the behaviour is apportioned to the individual as the law demands. The complexity arises when it’s not just the people in the physical, but it’s also spirits in the spirit world who are affecting the entire system that influences the child.
7.5. Forgiveness is automatic when we feel the pain of what has been done to us
So I need to forgive those other influences?
It’s not God forgiving them, it’s me forgiving them?
It is you forgiving them. The things that you are asking God to forgive are the things that you have done to the environment and the other people. That damage is very, very difficult for you to personally repair because once the damage is done it’s very, very hard to undo. Once you scream at somebody, once you yell at somebody, once you smack somebody, once you hurt somebody, once you make somebody have addictions with you, once you have released the causes from inside of yourself they may still have the injury that you caused and this is where you need God’s forgiveness.
This is really a three-pronged issue for us: we need to learn to forgive others, we need to learn to forgive ourselves and we need to learn to repent for our own unloving behaviour. Once we engage these three particular things we are capable of having a very close relationship with God.
So I need to feel all of my causal feelings, know where they came from and forgive my parents?
It’s not that complicated. All you need to do with your causal emotions is to feel them and when you feel them you will automatically forgive. It’s the process of feeling them that is actually the forgiveness.
So when you stop avoiding feeling your emotions and you feel them does forgiveness happen automatically?
Yes, this is correct. It is important to understand that forgiveness is not an intellectual activity but rather a process of feeling the emotional feelings of damage that other people did to you. This is what it means to forgive so rather than taking out those feelings on other people, rather than trying to punish other people for what they have done, it is taking the second option to feel the damage without harming another.
7.6. The power of forgiveness ‒ an example of violence in the Middle East
If I can give a good illustration! In the Middle East at the moment we have the Israelis and the Arabs. Now the Israelis feel a feeling towards the Arabs, they feel that the Arabs want to destroy them and so what they do is they destroy the Arab first. The Arabs feel the same feeling, they feel that the Israelis want to destroy them and so they feel they are just reacting to the Israeli’s feelings. This is what happens when we take an eye for an eye. Gandhi said it makes both of us blind.
If I decide to harm Adriana and if she decides to not feel her feelings of hurt about that, then she will try to harm me and then we have one harming the other, harming the other, harming the other. This is the main cause of all of our problems on Earth. We do this in the family, we do it with our friends and we do it nation between nation.
If instead of doing this, if the Israeli who felt attacked by the Arab just decided to cry about the attack without getting a gun and attacking back, then he would release the emotion in him that causes the desire to attack. Now if he did this, it would have a powerful effect on the Arab who is attacking and the same applies in the reverse.
If the Arab decided ‒ instead of attacking the Israeli in return for the Israeli’s attack on him ‒ the Arab decided to feel his grief and emotions about being attacked and even his grief and emotions about his child dying from an attack rather than wanting to attack back, then the whole reason inside of the soul would be released.
But this requires very brave people because it requires that you trust God’s Laws and that you learn to forgive even when other people may potentially attack you and most of us do not want to do that. Most of us would like to attack a person who attacks us rather than to forgive. It requires a person very developed in love to forgive somebody who is purposefully attacking them, but if we can do that we can change the world.
You see the thing we need to bear in mind is that the injured self was created by others and others bear the responsibility for its creation, but the facade self and what we’ve chosen to do after that, that is our own responsibility and we need to take responsibility for that. We don’t need to take responsibility for the injured self except in one way ‒ that now the feelings are inside of us only we ourselves can release them ‒ no one else can release your feelings; even the person who created your feelings cannot release your feelings.
8. We need to engage God during repentance to help us undo the damage we have created
We need to say to ourselves, “Even though somebody else created these feelings, I need to feel them and once I feel them I have automatically forgiven them, but for all the things I have done to harm others I need to choose to repent for. Some of this repentance needs to be aimed towards the person, but some of it also needs to go towards God because it is only God who has the power to help them go through the process of releasing it all. Even if I repent for what I have done to harm a person the damage may still remain in them for many years”, and this is where our prayer to God is so important, because it’s only God who can help rub out all of the damage we have done.
For example, if you look at what many religions have taught on the planet! Many of these religions have taught people that it is right to go and fight for the religion. Now the ministers and priests who taught this bear a large responsibility for a person going to war. The minister who then goes through repentance for telling this group of people to go to war cannot change the results of what these people are going through once they went to war. He doesn’t have the power to do so, he can’t get inside of their hearts and take away their pain, it’s only God who can do that. It’s only God’s Love that has that effect.
The minister who is repentant would realise that there are many things that he cannot correct because he taught the wrong thing. He can only pray to God that God help him to correct it and God, through Her Love, has the ability to help every person who has been harmed by that minister. This is why much of our repentance must be directed towards God, because it is also a prayer to God that God help us repair the damage we have done; we are not powerful enough to repair it all ourselves.
8.1. The results of teaching untruths
I have been teaching wrong things and I pray to God to forgive me for breaking Her Laws. Can God take away the damage from those people feeling the feelings of the injury I have caused in them?
Well firstly if you were truly repentant you would know every teaching that is wrong and therefore you would understand the effects of every teaching that is wrong. In addition you would also be attempting to help those people who you taught to understand the new understanding you have of truth. However even though you are doing that, many of these people may have already acted on your previous advice and this is where God can
help, because when you direct your feelings of repentance to God you would also be praying to God to help these particular people to make the changes necessary that you have had to make.
God can help these people in every case except for one: they have to exercise their will where they want help.
God cannot force their will because God gave them the gift of free will in the first place. It’s once we realise this that we feel the full effect of repentance because we see the influence we have had on others that has caused them to harden their will, which then also caused them to harden against God and to be unable to receive help. Once we realise this in our own soul we will have deep feelings of sorrow because we have no way to correct it. This is true repentance.
We’re doing everything we can to fix it but unfortunately we can’t fix everything because the will of the other person must be engaged and once we realise this fully, we feel deep feelings of remorse because we see the effects of our own unloving behaviour on people’s lives for a long, long time. This is a very sobering feeling and causes us to be very humble in the future. It also causes us to be very careful about what we teach, whether it’s to our children or to others.
It’s a beautiful feeling you are feeling. This is a feeling that is involved with repentance. This repentance feeling is very, very powerful for the soul because you realise the soul’s limitations, the limit.
The limits of your soul are that you have changed other people’s will through your teachings and now find it very difficult to undo, because they may not be open to you undoing it. This is something that every person who teaches comes to understand at some point. Remember that every parent is a teacher and the persons they taught are their children. So you may realise that you have had a lasting effect on your child, but even if you are sorry for your unloving behaviour, your child may go on for many years acting on what they have been taught.
So everything we teach that does not engage God and the soul, causes damage?
No I can’t agree with that. There are many things that you can teach which are true but that may not engage the soul or God, and there are no penalties for these teachings as long as they are true. In other words you may teach a scientific fact, it may not be all of the truth but it is the truth that we know at the moment and as long as that is in line with the rest of God’s universal truth, there is no penalty upon the soul.
If we teach something to heal the body or spiritual body without engaging the soul then it’s not true?
I agree: this is where it’s very important for us if we are truly going to teach that we understand what we are teaching. Remember, last week in Belo Horizonte we talked to Chico Xavier and he mentioned that he taught many things on Earth that he does not agree with now. This is a problem ‒ many times people on Earth believe they know but do not actually know. We are best to teach only the things we actually know and other than that admit that we are students.
Any teacher bears a great responsibility, and remember that any one of us who have had children have automatically become a teacher, so we all bear a great responsibility for what we have taught. If there is something that you do not know for certain, it is far better to present it as something you don’t know for certain and then there is no responsibility. When you teach something that you feel you know for certain and you teach this certainty to others ‒ if it happens to be wrong or incorrect then it bears a great responsibility.
8.2. If we are acting in love there is less penalty if we teach an untruth
What is the responsibility of a physician who does not believe in any of this when he or she is treating the patient?
One thing we must bear in mind with responsibility is one basic truth ‒ if my action is in harmony with love, there is always a more positive effect than any other emotion so if I have become a physician only to earn money and not because I love, then anything I do with the patient is already out of harmony with love. It’s very important for us all to choose occupations that are in harmony with our desires to love.
Now even if we teach an untruth there is less responsibility if we loved while we did it than if we did not love while we did it. The key thing for us to bear in mind though is: even if we do love and we finish up teaching an untruth there will of course be some penalty, because the untruth has an effect on other people’s lives. But one thing that makes us much safer from our soul’s perspective is to love everything we do even if we do make a mistake and teach an untruth, the fact that we did it out of love will mean that our conscience will not bother us as much as if we had done it for another motive.
Any person of any occupation can first choose to love even when they don’t know the truth and God always rewards love. The intention to love has a very powerful healing effect on others and while untruth does affect others, if we had a feeling of love rather than a feeling of attacking them, or punishing them or harming them or for some selfish reasons such as earning money, if we had the intention to love, it can overcome a great deal of harm that is done to others.
Of course at some point in the future we will have to feel about the untruth so in the question that you asked about a doctor who did not believe the truth, if his action is in harmony with love towards people and not because he desires prominence, or desires wealth, then the damage he does to others is far less than if he engaged the untruth with all of those other unloving emotions. God measures everything by love first and then by truth next. It’s beautiful what God does.
9. The different speeds of engaging the Law of Compensation vs. the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness
I think we have given you a basic understanding of the two different laws: the Law of Compensation which acts upon the unwilling soul and tries to push the soul into a place of realising its unloving behaviour, and the Law
of Repentance and Forgiveness which acts upon the willing soul and causes them to remove from themselves very rapidly the cause of their own unloving behaviour.
To give you some concept of the difference in speed of these laws, I would like to compare the two types of laws in their effect. I know many spirits in the spirit world who have been engaged in the Law of Compensation for two thousand years or more, paying for their lives’ unloving behaviour while they were on Earth. They are now in the spirit world still engaged in this law because they are unwilling to see the damage they have done.
I have seen other spirits who had just as much damage as the first group of spirits and who had harmed many, many millions of people while on Earth but they have engaged the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness and within twenty years they are complete of all of the unloving behaviour. I have seen some of these spirits go from the hells of the first dimension to the condition of at-onement with God, which is in the eighth dimension, in a space of only twenty or thirty years while other spirits who have been involved in the Law of Compensation are in the hells of the spirit world in the first sphere and they’ve remained there for two or three thousand years, or longer. That’s the difference between engaging your desire to be sorry for the things that you have done in comparison to resisting being sorry for anything you have done.
What we would like to do tomorrow is illustrate this in practice with many spirits. When we came here to Brazil we felt many spirits around us who are still Earth bound, or in the hells of the spirit world, and these spirits are having an effect on many Brazilians’ day-to-day life. What we would like to do tomorrow ‒ in a mediumship session with Mary ‒ is help these spirits to understand the Law of Repentance and Forgiveness, because we feel that if we can help them understand this law they can progress much more rapidly in the spirit world and then have less effect over the Earth. It will also give you an opportunity to see what it feels like in the spirit world going through the Law of Compensation because that’s the law that many of these spirits are already under. I feel that’s a natural end to today’s discussion. Tomorrow we can talk about in practice by helping some of the spirits go through that process and describing that to you.
10. Coming to terms with the pain that our families have caused us
How do you feel about this discussion? You can speak honestly; you don’t have to worry about injuring my sensibilities! (Laughs) What are you feeling?
I’m feeling very emotional about my resistance to acknowledging the hurt that’s been done to me in my life, because I’ve been trying to engage repentance and can’t do it unless I feel what’s been done to me.
And it’s very important to see that. For most of us when it comes to dealing with our injured selves we tend to follow our family line and the family line is to say, “We didn’t do anything that harmed you.” The family finds it very difficult to accept that they did something that harmed us and we are often so afraid of them that we’re willing to blame our self rather than place the blame where it lies. For many women this is a major cause of their depression and this is a big cause of why we have so much anti-depressant medication. We suppress the damage that is being done and then we have to take pills to make ourselves feel better about doing that.
I have the same problem as Mary but I don’t have any family around me and I still do that. I have something inside of me where I want to believe they’re better even though they’re not around.
We have a big personal investment in believing our family to be good and the big personal investment is this: while I can believe them to be good, I don’t have to feel the pain they’ve created so I am emotionally invested in
not seeing the pain they created. I tell myself everything was fine or I tell myself I cannot go there, and these are both harmful things to do to our own soul. We must understand that we have emotional investments in not feeling these feelings and if we don’t deal with those emotional investments, then we will not feel those feelings; we will justify to ourselves staying away from them.
In addition we carry around the belief systems of our family inside our soul. It’s like a weight or a burden that we carry around in our life and we feel we must live by them even if our family are no longer on Earth and so in this way we continue to harm ourselves in the same way that our family harmed us.
10.1. Reasons why people blame themselves for what their parents did to them
It’s especially big around issues of sexual damage and sexual harm. There’s so much about blaming yourself in that and it’s kind of very difficult to connect to, “That it wasn’t my fault.” The feeling of the shame entering me is, “It is my fault that I am bad.”
The problem that we have in most families is that the parents do believe that the child is to blame for the treatment from the parent and so the child grows up to believe that it needs to accept the blame. This is a very difficult emotion to erase, because we continue to accept blame for things that are not our fault.
We also have an emotional investment in accepting the blame. If this is a pain scale, the higher the personal pain the more of a tendency we will have to not acknowledge the source of the pain.
If the source of the pain is the parent and we have very high levels of pain about that parent, if we are unwilling to feel our own emotions, we will attempt to suppress the pain caused by that parent, by accepting the blame ourselves. We tell ourselves that we are to blame for how they treated us.
We do this because the parent believes the same thing. In addition if we do not accept the blame, then our parent will probably have huge amounts of rage towards us and what we want is love from the parent ‒ we don’t want rage ‒ so what we do is we accept their definition of reality rather than accepting the truth.
But this is not repentance and this is not forgiveness. A person who repents can see the pain that their parent has created and can see the damage they themselves have done. They do not accept the pain of the parent as if it’s their own creation. This is very important to understand.
And you said the way is to feel the feeling?
Yes, you see once this child is an adult it accepts the blame the parent has projected at it for two primary reasons. The first reason is so that it doesn’t feel the pain about that parent and the second reason is to avoid the parent’s potential rage so the grown up child has a huge emotional investment in not facing the truth.
This is the difficulty that many people face and this is also why many psychoanalysts and psychologists have difficulties in helping the child ‒ who is now an adult ‒ firstly see the truth about what the parent has done and secondly feel the pain about what they’ve done. Instead this child often wants another alternative. This grown child doesn’t want to feel the pain and wants the parent to love them and wants the parent to never be in a rage with them and so this grown child has an emotional investment to not forgive and to not feel the pain.
10.2. Children learn that they are bad from their parents and environment
I think even if I could really see and feel their guilt, and that it was their responsibility, I accepted the blame anyway because I feel I’m not a good person.
So you’re almost telling yourself they did it because you were a bad person.
No I think I could feel that they were the one who did it to me, but I have made what they did to me…
As your fault?
No it was not my fault but I’m a bad person, yeah?
Yes, let’s talk about this “bad person” thing for a bit. A child does not automatically believe itself to be a bad person, so if a child is taking on a belief that it is a bad person, it has to have come from somebody else in the environment. A child has no opinion of itself when it is first conceived, good or bad. It only takes on the opinions of others around it generally. If by the time you’ve become an adult you believe that you are
intrinsically bad and this is the reason why bad things were done to you, then this underlying belief had to have come from somewhere.
Now this is a belief that the majority of the world has and in fact religions tell us this over and over again. They tell us that our heart is bad from the moment we are born and so many societies have grown up with this belief and that therefore causes us to accept bad treatment without seeing it as the responsibility of the person who’s treating us badly.
This is a very large global emotion that I see in different nations all around the Earth. They believe they all need a saviour to make them good, and this is why many have then accepted the erroneous concepts of Christianity. I also notice that even when many are not Christians they still have the belief that to be human is to be imperfect but this is not true. God created us with the ability to be perfect and also God did not create any of us with an intrinsic badness. Any feeling of badness that has come about inside of us has either been taught to us or we have been blamed and we need to feel about that.
Our readiness to believe that we are bad or that there is something in us that attracted this bad behaviour causes us to be willing to accept bad behaviour. This then gives a lot of power to people who are willing to engage bad behaviour, because they tell us, “I’m doing this because you want it,” or, “Because you deserve it.” This is even how national problems have occurred where whole races of people have been treated badly because they’ve been taught that they are bad.
10.2.1. Our injuries begin as soon as we are conceived
When you say that a child is too young to do something wrong, that it’s the family or the environment that made them feel that, can it be as soon as when you are born, for example if the mother has post natal depression? Can it start there.
It can even start before then: the moment a child is conceived it is absorbing the emotions from its parents. So if the mother or father already feels bad about themselves, the child is learning to feel bad about itself and if the mother and father feel guilt from anything they have done that they’re yet to release from themselves, the child will feel guilty about things that it doesn’t know anything about, because the feeling of guilt enters the child.
I feel like I was born with guilt and even in my family my mum says that, “You have guilt in yourself. I don’t know where it comes from.” Now I think I know.
This is the legacy of a parent not dealing with their own emotion, in that even at conception the child absorbs these emotions and then starts to believe things about itself that are in error. If the parent had released its emotion of guilt then a child would be conceived and born without any feeling of guilt.
I was just saying to Isabella if her mum is depressed and angry and blaming her as a baby, and then of course she feels it.
May I point out that many mothers when they are pregnant have many uncertain emotions. They often feel like they’re not ready for motherhood and this will make the child very afraid about coming into the world. In addition many parents might have had four or five children already and they don’t really have a strong feeling of wanting the child, and of course the child will feel that as well. Every emotion that the mother and father feel
towards the child, the child will be absorbing so if the father felt like he wasn’t ready for fatherhood and is angry about the pregnancy of his wife, then the little child will feel like they are the cause of their father’s rage.
There are very many emotions that a child will have as a result of what the parents feel during the pregnancy. If you look at the average pregnancy there is often a whole series of emotions that the mother and father are experiencing, and these emotions are entering the child as soon as the child is conceived ‒ it’s no wonder that we have so many injuries.
Of course these are the injuries we need to forgive, and if we go through the process of forgiving, we will feel them. It’s the feeling of them that creates forgiveness. It’s not an intellectual activity, but rather a release of the emotion we have towards the other.
The logic of my parents injuring me; now I still need to feel the effect of my parents injuring me before I can forgive them. What do I do to feel it?
The fastest possible way to feel it is to go back to your childhood and remember events in which you felt terrible and allow yourself to feel about each of those events. This is the thing that most people avoid because they feel the past is the past, you’ve got to forget about the past, you’ve got to get on with life and when they do that they carry around all of those feelings.
You see when we were a child we often wanted to cry about bad things as they were happening, but our parents often suppressed this emotion; they shut us down from crying. Remember the crying is the grieving, this deep sorrow of release. If we were allowed to cry and release the grief when we were a child, we’d have less things that we need to clear when we’re an adult. But for most of us ‒ and in particular yourself with regard to your father and mother ‒ there was a large amount of damage created with no allowance for you to feel it. The fastest way to address this emotionally is to go back to these childhood situations and ask God to show you the unfelt emotion in each one of them, and God will show you. God is reliable like that.
These are all very good questions.
11. Closing Words
Tomorrow, in our session “Mediumship with Mary ‒ Repentance and Forgiveness” we’ll have some interactions with spirits. We’ll help them go back to their childhoods and work through some of their emotions of forgiveness. We’ll also help them to see the unloving choices that they have made in their lives and help them to get into a state of repentance. Hopefully you will see the effect it has, as hopefully they will describe the effect it has on them. We don’t organise any interaction with spirits in advance so what happens tomorrow happens, but I feel there are many spirits who would like to talk with us about this principle of forgiveness and repentance. I feel we’ll have many opportunities come up tomorrow to discuss those things with them.
I’d love to thank you for your questions today and also for your time. Thank you. (Applause)